During a divorce assets are divided. What can be harder than dividing up the marital property is for you to determine where your children’s things belong. Your children have their own things that are theirs and determining where these things are kept can be a challenge. The main thing that the parents need to remember is that since these are the child’s things, where they are kept needs to be a conversation that is had with the children. It is unfair to them if you are determining where all of their things will be without talking to them about it.
5 Steps to Determine Where Your Child’s Assets Belong
Step 1 – Determine Where the Child’s Time Will Be Spent
The first thing that you have to do when you are determining where your child’s things should be is to determine where your child is going to be. If your child is going to be in one place more than the other, then it is important to take note of this and decide what of your child’s is most important so that they will have it there.
One option that works for some parents is to have two properties that are to be sold and compensated for after the child turns 18. How this typically works is that one home is where the children live. The parent who is to spend the time with the child stays in that home with them. Then the parent that is not with the child gets to stay in the other property.
This can work well with parents who are not going to have any other children but if they become involved with someone who has children or have more of their own then it is not something that will work. So there are many factors to consider before making this an option for your family.
Step 2 – Talk to Your Child
It really does not matter how old your child is. At some point you are going to have to discuss the divorce with them. When you are discussing the divorce, you can talk to the child about where they want certain things to be at. Explain to your child that they will want some things at each parent’s house. When you do this, they will be able to help pick out what they have at each place.
You can talk about things that they want to take back and forth too like a special stuffed animal and blanket. You can also help them to choose between things that they will want when they are with each parent. Try to be fair about dividing things like games and consider which parent played the games with the child while living in the same home. Also think about these types of things with books. Being fair is the best way to make sure that your child has what makes them feel at home in both homes.
Step 3 – Think About Where the Item Came From
With big ticket items, think about where the item came from if there is a struggle. If it came from a friend or family member, consider whose house that friend or family member will see the child at. Doing this helps those friends and family members see the child enjoying the things that they have purchased for them.
Step 4 – Consider Buying Doubles
There are some items that you will even want to consider purchasing so that you have them at both homes. Consider buying doubles of favorite toys, blankets, and even bedding if that is going to make your child the most comfortable. Agree to share the cost of these items. If you do this, it might cost a little bit of money but it is going to make the child feel more comfortable as they transition between homes.
Step 5 – Discuss It in Court
If you are fighting over items, it can be damaging to your child. Do not fight over things. Instead, make a list of the things that you do not agree with. Then take this list to court with you. Reasonably consider what is going to be best for your child. If both parents, feel that it is best for them to have these items then you will have to let a judge determine what the best choices are.
Deciding how to separate the child’s belongings can be quite difficult. The easiest way for this to happen is for both parents to make sure that they have everything that they need and then to think about what their child wants. The goal is not for one parent to have more than the other. Instead it is so that the child has what they need to feel comfortable and be happy in both homes.